written out of boredom

December 27, 2009 2:30pm

i guess i cannot fully move on unless i learn to love somebody else. because every time i try, i just find myself coming back for him. i loved him not because i feel that he fits for me. i loved him not because i don't see his flaws. i loved him... because HE is HIM. I can't find a single reason why i loved him so deeply.


and this answers... WHY i don't have any reason to FORGET him, to LET HIM GO... to move on for my self.


in the first place, HE WAS NEVER MINE to lose.
It hurts losing something you don't even OWN.

i <3 nature

di ko na naupdate yung page ko.
i just came back from nueva ecija
waha.


ayun. sinugod ko ang:
BUNDOK, GUBAT, BUKID, at DAGAT.

i wish mas matagal pa sana kame nagstay dun.


i want to share some of the photos i've taken there.
these are from my phone so don't expect high quality pics. LOL

the year's coming to an end.. already?

sayang. hindi lahat ng barkada ng room nakasama.
much happier sana kung nakapag bonding lahat.

eto ko ngayon.
may bagong kinaadikan.
is this for better? or for worse?

ooops.ooopsss.
it think this is better.
getting addicted to manga and anime again.
at least I don't get any heartaches and heartbreaks.

kachat ko nga pala SIYA kanina.
as usual.
nothing special.


well, i'm not really special.
how i wish i could meet someone like SHOUTA KAZEHAYA.
LOL.



signing off...
kuronuma sawako
^_^

the answer is in my hand ^_^

musta naman yun?
kakatanong ko lang kahapon o.
andame na agad nagprove na FRIENDS ko sila.

EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED talaga.
things are occuring not the way you think about it.


Natouch naman ako sa mga tao ngayon.
Si Gader, Si 208, Si Dama jo Kiwi, at ang mga NFF ko.

Saya!
It's all i've got..
STRONG
social life. family life. academic life.


pero WEAK ang lovelife.

and so??!
haha.
i don't really need some heartaches right now.
SO FIGHT.

my friends are ENOUGH.

F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

"sino walang kaibigan, taas ang kamay.

walang nagtaas, ibig sabihin lahat meron, nakakatuwang isipin, na kahit ang pinakamasamang tao, may maituturing na kaibigan, lilinawin ko, maituturing. Ituring mo man na kaibigan lahat ng tao na nakapaligid sau, ang tanong: sa kanila, kaibigan ka rin bang tunay?"


quoted from mak.
he's a good writer.
dameng thoughts.
lalim siguro ng pinaghuhugutan.
astiiiig.


i've been asking that question a million times.
i consider everyone around me a great part of my life already 'coz they're my FRIENDS. pero sa kanila...
isa lamang ba akong... classmate, roommate, schoolmate, batchmate, kapitbahay, kakilala.. and nothing deeper than that? isn't that a bit unfair?

"ui. si dah nga pala, dati kong classmate.." "si darlene o, kapitbahay ko"
wala bang... "si dah, friend ko."


...well, I just have to wait for the answer.
It's actually tiring thinking about things negatively.

harhar.

Nakakawindang ng 5pm

Sabe ni ina at ama, "Bukas ka na lang bumalik. Mag videoke muna tayo"... Sabe ko naman, "Ayaw. May bibilhin pa ko sa SM. blah. blah. blah. [dameng dahilan].

Lumayas na ko @ 5pm.

Eto na. Eto na. Waaa


1. Disaster sa jeep:

Sumakay ng jeep. Wala halos laman. Umupo sa front seat. Sobrang trapik sa palengke! Nakakatakot yung mga taong dumadaan. Andameng nanghihingi ng limos. May sumakay pa sa tabi kong matanda! Biglang nagtawag, "SM, SM, Zabarte, Almar". Hindi naman siya kilala nung driver. Ito dahilan: Wala siya pambayad.

'Pag lagpas sa palengke, may mukang adik na nagsabe, "Naku, miss, ingat ka diyan." (pertaining to the driver). Tae. Bigla akong kinabahan. Eto pa, tinanong ako kung 'san daw ba ko pupunta? uwi daw ba kong province. Anung paki niya? DEMOIT! Sinabe ko na lang, punta kong dorm.

Nung bumaba na si manong 123, may mga sumakay sa likod. TATLONG LASING! Nung una, ayos pa e. Nagkukwentuhan sila. Yung isa, katabi ko pa sa harap. Kainis, amoy alak. Tapos nung bandang Almar na. Nagkakayabangan na sa likod, nagtatanungan na ng FRAT. Tapos yung nagsasalita na yung isa about sa SUMPAK. Sabe niya, "tol, suportahan mo ko kung may makorsonadahan ako a? may dala ka ba jan?" sabe nung isa, "oo, tol. di kita iiwan. ikaw may dala ka ba jan" "siyempre naman" tapos may bumabang lalaki sa olympus na dapat sa Sacre pa ang baba. Biglang sabe nung mayabang, "tara, tol. Bugbugin natin yun? mas mataas na ko sa kanya ngayon. Mahahabol pa natin yun. Tara na." GRABE. Sobrang kinakabahan na ko nun. Feeling ko, wala ng dugo sa labi ko. Haha. Buti na lang bumaba na yung tatlong itlog na yun.. sabe nung driver, "Hanggang salita lang naman yung mga yun e"... Naisip ko tuloy, "Bakit manong, 'pag ikaw pinagtripan, kakasa ka?? Hahahaha"..

Pagdating sa olympus, medyo may shock pa ko sa mga pangyayari. Konti na lang yung mga nasa likod ng jeep. Then may sumakay na madame. Walo sila. Nahimasmasan ako kase nakakita ko ng gwapo. Nawala kaba ko. Kaya lang, nawindang din ako sa kanila. MGA BALIKBAYAN. First time lang makasakay ng JEEP. Mga galing nga CANADA. Mega picture sila sa loob. Tapos mega english. Para silang... ewan. Haha! Sabe pa nung isa, "If you ride on a jeep, make sure you take care of your belongings. There are these people who may snatch away your cellphone, your bag... everything." Nyek. Magsasabe siya ng ganun e lantaran yung mga gadgets sila sa loob. Buti sana kung sila lang pasahero. Haaaay....

Sa wakas, nasa SM na. Nagdinner ng shawarma.


2. Disaster sa FX

Forward. Backward. Forward. Backward. Buwisiiiiiit na FX yaN! Ang bilis tapos biglang PRENO. Shawarma pa naman dinner ko. Muntik na kong mag THROW-UP! brrrr...


^_^
Lesson learned:
Sumunod sa parents! WAHAHAHA

Lesson learned in P.E.

This entry was suppose to be posted last December 11, 2009

[35% exact lang ang conversation na ito. nasa likod ako e. ^_^]

While having quiz,
Ian: Ma'am kailangan pa ba ng meaning sa different terms?
Prof: Did I tell you to put the meaning? I said write down different volleyball terms as many as you want. Pag nilagyan niyo ng meaning yan, maMINUSan ko kayo.


LESSON LEARNED: Applied in life...and in love?!

Hindi lahat ng bagay, kailangan bigyan natin ng kahulugan. Hangga't hindi sinasabe, 'wag na lang. Kase, ikaw din ang kawawa. Ikaw na nga nagpakahirap, ikaw na nag-effort, ikaw pa ang mawawalan. Masasaktan ka lang kase hindi ka makakatanggap ng appreciation. Mababawasan pa tiwala mo sa sarili mo.

APPRECIATION. Isang bagay na mahirap matanggap kapag hindi mutual ang nararamdaman.


~_~ wawa lang tayo. nuh?!

THE LEG

THE LEG

by Karl Shapiro

Among the iodoform, in twilight-sleep;

What have I lost? he first inquires,

Peers in the middle distance where a pain

Ghost of a nurse, hastily moves, and day,

Her blinding presence in his eyes

And how his ears. They are handling him

With rubber hands. He wants to get up.

One day beside some flowers nears his nose

He will be thinking, When will I look at it?

And pain, still in the middle distance, will reply,

At what? And he will know it's gone

O where! And begin to tremble and cry.

He will begin to cry as a child cries

Whose puppy is mangled under a screaming wheel.

Later as if deliberately, his fingers

Begin to explore the stump. He learns a shape

That is comfortable and tucked in like a sock,

This has a sense of humor, this can despise

The finest surgical limb, the dignity of limping,

The non-sense of wheel chairs. Now he smiles to the wall:

The amputation becomes an acquisition.

For the leg is wondering where he is (all is not lost)

And surely he has a duty to the leg;

He is its injury, the leg is his orphan,

He must cultivate the mind of the leg.

Pray for the part that is missing, pray for peace

In the image of man, pray, pray for its safty,

And after a little, it will die quietly.

The body, what is Father, but a sign

To love the force that grows us, to give back

What in Thy palm is senselessness and mud?

Knead, knead the substance of our understanding

Which must be beautiful in flesh to walk,

That if Thou take me angrily in hand

And hurl me to the shark, I shall not die!

This is the poem I reported in our Literature class. It's not that famous and it's really hard to obtain informations and background of these. So I posted this so I may help someone unconsciously. LOL.

Ref: Literature of the World by Lacia

expect the unexpected.

who would think about that?

i'm not that lucky though...

it's just that there's Him that helps me.

without any reference on the net about my report,

i got 100 points. i don't really expect that.

minsan kasi sa buhay, hindi tamang palagi nating inaasahan yung mga mangyayari.

yung mga surprises pa nga ng buhay ang talagang nakapagpapasaya sa atin.

kasi, 'pag inasahan mo ang isang bagay na akala mo ikasasaya mo, sobrang mafufrustrate ka

lang pag 'di mo nafeel yung happiness that you've expected to enjoy.

ayun. sakit lang sa loob makukuha mo.

unlike if you just go on with flow of life, without any expectations,

you'll appreciate the things you least value because it could be the very thing that'll give you the happiness you've been finding.

SO GO! FIND SURPRISES.

TAKE RISKS. TAKE CONSEQUENCES.

BUT REMEMBER TO HAVE FAITH IN YOURSELF.

AND MOST OF ALL, FAITH IN HIM.

Love lots!

Dah :)

Ups and downs

There are really no permanent things here in this world. And this was PROVEN by self-experiences. Just like these past few weeks, I was so down and so depressed, I even had self-pity. I thought this would last longer, but surprisingly, I was happy and contented today. And the one who's very happy these days, was feeling down.

MY CONCLUSION: We can't be too happy, we can't be too sad for a long period of time. Happiness and sorrow are ingredients that makes our lives COMPLETE. As they say, there's a rainbow after the rain. :]

I wanna grow old with you

I wanna make you smile
Whenever you're sad
Carry you around
When your arthritis is bad
All I wanna do is
Grow old with you.

I'll get you medicine
When your tummy aches
Build you a fire
When the furnace breaks
It could be so nice
Growing old with you.

I'll miss you
I'll kiss you
Give you my coat when you are cold
Need you
Feed you
Even let you hold the remote control

Let me do the dishes
In our kitchen sink
Put you to bed
When you've had too much to drink
I could be the man who
Grows old with you
I wanna grow old with you